Matsui Sleeps Alone Tonight

New York Yankee Hideki Matsui brought dishonor to his team when, with the bases loaded and 2 outs in the bottom of the ninth inning, he fell asleep standing at the plate.

In a rare moment of supreme sportsmanship, several Orioles players skipped their customary victory hot-dog party, and fashioned a makeshift vertical bed out of cones and dirt, so that Matsui could slumber peacefully.

Matsui reported an excellent night of sleep, save for his dream that a turtle ate his face.
He was awoken by real turtles practicing turtle-ball.